Aw, c’mon Floyd!

Dear Floyd “Sour Grapes” Landis,

C’mon!  I mean, I’m sorry that you worked really really hard and accomplished  your life’s dream of winning that slog through hell that is the Tour de France only to have it stripped away from you for doing what many of your competitors were doing and taking what many of your heroes have taken.  But c’mon!  Don’t drag Lance into this.  Get back into your hyperbolic chamber for a few hours and oxygenate your blood and think on this a little.

Sure we need truth, and drug free sports.  But we need Lancelot more.  Shit.  I don’t even like cycling.  It’s boring as hell.  But I like Lance.  That man was born to beat the cancer and wear that golden jersey and flash that brilliant smile.  Don’t take that from us, Lloyd!  I mean, Floyd!  C,mon!

Everything’s getting all backwards.  Here’s Robert Downy Jr., who never had cancer and has used LOTS of drugs that didn’t even enhance his performances, who’s on top of the flippin’ world right now.  He’s the damn Sherlock Movable Metal Man Holmes getting to hook up with that red hottie from The Notebook who’s half his age.  How can HIS star be rising and Lance friggin ARMSTRONG’s be about to fall thanks to YOU Lloyd!  And don’t tell me RDJ is an actor so it’s okay for him to use drugs.  We need our fictions, even if they’re supposed to be truths, and most of us probably need to be on whatever helped Lancelot, the REAL iron man, win the crown SEVEN times in a row despite the cancer that was previously in his testicles.

Sincerely,

HSBC

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